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Prospectus Hit List for June 26



by Matt Sussman

Hit List for June 25 Hit List for June 27
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.

Mostly LOLs, a few SMHs, and one or two SMDHs

Rk TmWLW1W2W3HLFAHLFWin Div%Win WC%Playoff%1-Day7-Day
1

34

43

37.7

39.9

38.6

.525

.545

1.5%

5.2%

6.7%

0.8%

-3.2%

They've won seven straight games against Detroit, building a strong argument to relocate to the AL Central in their heads.
2

41

35

40.2

38.9

39.1

.520

.500

47.9%

5.5%

53.4%

1.1%

6.8%

Eric Hinske's suspension was reduced from five games to one because MLB confused him with failed Reagan assassin John Hinckley.
3

45

33

45.6

45.9

44.4

.544

.524

86.1%

3.6%

89.6%

1.2%

-0.5%

B.J. Upton's batting average of .177 is nearly as high as it's been all year, and will continue to improve with every additional 1-for-5 night.
4

43

35

40.4

40.9

41.5

.499

.519

9.4%

22.1%

31.5%

0.6%

-8.6%

Alexi Casilla has hit two home runs in the last two seasons, both off Justin Masterson.
5

46

33

47.2

46.0

46.0

.560

.580

51.1%

31.4%

82.5%

4.3%

-2.7%

If they ever need to repaint the Green Monster, just coat the baseballs in paint and pitch to David Ortiz.
6

32

42

33.1

32.7

30.6

.447

.467

0.1%

0.2%

0.3%

-0.2%

-0.3%

They are 9-13 against the AL Central. They have not played the Tigers yet.
7

31

44

35.5

38.0

38.4

.477

.457

0.0%

0.7%

0.7%

-0.0%

-0.4%

If you love something, like Carlos Marmol, set it free. If he comes back, you forgot to change the locks.
8

45

33

44.8

45.7

45.6

.566

.546

22.3%

63.7%

86.0%

-1.5%

-4.1%

They're in Oakland this week, but can't find a decent chili place anywhere. What is this, seaweed?!
9

39

37

39.7

38.1

38.7

.502

.522

10.3%

15.0%

25.3%

-1.9%

4.1%

Kipnisness (n): the state or property of being Jason Kipnis. See also: Kipnissitiude, Kipnicity, Kipnistentialism
10

39

39

41.8

44.2

42.6

.500

.480

14.6%

2.9%

17.6%

-1.4%

-4.7%

The best kept secret in Denver is Michael Cuddyer's 22-game hitting streak, or maybe that one restaurant with the pancakes.
11

42

33

45.3

50.6

50.2

.598

.617

88.4%

5.0%

93.4%

-1.9%

-0.9%

Rick Porcello's career ERA against the Angels is ... a frowny face? Let me check the math. Yep, it's a frowny face.
12

29

49

28.4

24.7

26.3

.366

.385

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

-0.0%

Well, the new logo hasn't lost its sparkling color off after literally dozens of loads of laundry.
13

35

39

37.8

31.4

32.2

.465

.485

0.9%

1.5%

2.4%

-1.7%

-5.1%

The only home run Ervin Santana has allowed this month in five starts was to the Astros. He's also faced Texas, Tampa Bay, Cleveland and Atlanta.
14

34

42

33.2

35.2

35.6

.515

.495

11.7%

1.9%

13.6%

1.1%

3.3%

Matt Kemp is back! A reminder of who Matt Kemp is for Dodgers fans: Matt Kemp was an easier-to-spell Yasiel Puig.
15

26

50

27.7

24.1

24.1

.371

.353

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Several teams have been asking about Ricky Nolasco, including a few confused stockbrokers trying to find a company called Nolasco's financial portfolio.
16

32

43

33.1

34.9

36.0

.469

.449

0.0%

0.7%

0.7%

0.0%

0.3%

They have more wins against the Phillies this year than any other team. Makes total sense.
17

34

39

33.8

34.2

34.8

.441

.461

0.3%

0.9%

1.2%

-0.1%

0.2%

Go into any hamburger joint in Minneapolis and order "The Mauer"; you'll get two singles but still be left wanting more.
18

42

34

38.0

35.2

35.6

.534

.554

25.7%

33.4%

59.1%

3.2%

-3.1%

If Brian Cashman wants to yell obscenities about Alex Rodriguez on Twitter he should have the dignity to sign up for an account and do it like the rest of us.
19

30

43

31.7

31.2

30.9

.459

.439

0.5%

0.4%

0.9%

-0.6%

-0.1%

No jokes, just hug a Mets fan when you see one wandering the streets without a sense of purpose or hope in their eyes. Look, there's one!
20

45

34

44.7

45.0

43.3

.542

.562

39.3%

31.0%

70.3%

3.7%

-8.8%

A man who does amazing things just by walking across a street is known as a Cespedestrian.
21

37

41

32.9

33.7

33.2

.457

.437

1.8%

1.6%

3.4%

0.4%

-3.8%

Jonathan Papelbon should focus harder when pitching. So hard, his mouth continually shrinks until it completely disappears.
22

47

30

42.6

41.6

43.0

.537

.518

24.7%

62.2%

86.8%

3.4%

18.7%

This week Tony Sanchez became the first National League player to make his major league debut as a DH since Nick Stavinoha for the Cardinals in 2008.
23

39

39

36.7

36.2

36.2

.473

.453

8.5%

1.5%

10.0%

-2.4%

-2.6%

Everybody wants to move the Petco Park fences in, but Alexi Amarista just wants to see over them. Here, hop on my shoulders.
24

34

44

32.0

34.0

34.3

.453

.473

0.0%

0.4%

0.4%

-0.4%

-0.8%

Kyle Seager quietly leads the team in doubles, walks and night moves.
25

38

39

36.6

39.5

40.3

.507

.487

17.3%

3.5%

20.8%

-3.4%

-15.3%

AT&T Park kindly asks you to stop bringing repellent into the stadium. Hunter Pence has been sneezing too much lately.
26

48

29

50.6

48.6

47.5

.584

.565

53.0%

42.8%

95.9%

0.8%

0.4%

Allen Craig has been thrown out at home six times, twice more than anybody else in the league.
27

41

37

41.2

44.1

45.1

.540

.560

12.3%

28.0%

40.3%

2.0%

14.7%

Yunel Escobar, a shortstop, finally. stole his first base of the season. Catcher Jose Molina, a Molina, already has two.
28

44

33

41.2

42.0

42.2

.550

.570

59.2%

19.9%

79.1%

-5.7%

14.1%

Tanner Scheppers has allowed five runs this season, three on home runs.
29

38

38

37.9

34.9

36.1

.492

.512

1.5%

6.0%

7.6%

-2.6%

0.5%

Jose Reyes is returning from injury at a moment in history where we can't figure out if the Blue Jays are for real, so it's like he never left.
30

38

38

34.7

33.9

34.2

.492

.472

11.6%

9.1%

20.7%

1.2%

2.2%

Bryce Harper is doing a rehab assignment with Class A Potomac. He is the youngest player on the roster by nine months.