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Prospectus Hit List for April 2



Hit List for October 2 Hit List for April 5
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.

Rk TmWLW1W2W3HLFAHLFWin Div%Win WC%Playoff%1-Day7-Day
1

3

1

2.8

2.5

2.4

.579

.584

5.5%

18.3%

23.8%

1.3%

0.0%

It seems as though the Angels finally understand that both halves of a Stars-and-Scrubs strategy need to be plural in order for that approach to work.
2

2

1

2.1

1.6

1.6

.573

.568

20.3%

30.7%

51.0%

-0.5%

0.0%

Early returns suggest that many of the humidor-based Diamondbacks projections were close, but no cigar.
3

2

1

2.5

2.4

2.4

.622

.617

6.0%

6.6%

12.6%

-0.1%

0.0%

Given what we know about April showers, there’s a high probability that Tyler Flower will be back in May.
4

1

2

0.4

0.2

0.3

.299

.303

0.5%

3.0%

3.5%

-0.4%

0.0%

The only way the Orioles rotation could get more Orioles is if it was also a poor defender.* (*Manny Machado is exempt from this joke.)
5

3

1

2.2

2.8

2.7

.605

.610

26.8%

36.5%

63.3%

2.4%

0.0%

Hope Alex Cora enjoyed his seven-inning honeymoon in the Boston media!
6

2

0

1.6

1.7

1.7

.655

.660

3.0%

6.9%

9.9%

0.1%

0.0%

The future remains bright, but unfortunately not quite bright enough to blind us from the present.
7

2

2

2.1

2.3

2.3

.555

.550

47.4%

21.5%

68.9%

-4.3%

0.0%

You know when you see an ex on Facebook or Instagram and you get jealous when they’re in better shape? That’s the opposite of what Kyle Schwarber is doing to us all right now.
8

0

3

0.7

0.9

0.9

.335

.331

1.8%

3.6%

5.4%

0.0%

0.0%

There’s ample speculation that the role of starting pitcher as we know it is on the way out, so uh, maybe the Reds are simply ahead of the curve?
9

1

2

1.4

1.0

1.1

.482

.487

81.4%

8.6%

90.0%

-2.0%

0.0%

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. That’s why the Indians abandoned their whole “improve the team” strategy.
10

1

2

0.9

1.4

1.4

.439

.435

2.6%

7.8%

10.4%

-0.9%

0.0%

It’s great that Ian Desmond has decided to live up to the legacy of past Rockies infielders by constantly being injured.
11

0

3

1.0

1.5

1.5

.379

.384

0.6%

1.4%

2.0%

-0.7%

0.0%

It’s nice to see that, despite a few years away from managing, Ron Gardenhire can still fill his Depends at lightning speed. He is our oldest rowdy boy.
12

3

1

3.1

3.2

3.1

.695

.699

86.3%

8.2%

94.5%

0.5%

0.0%

It’s worth noting that no team has ever won the World Series the year after defeating the Sports Illustrated cover jinx.
13

0

2

0.4

0.3

0.3

.270

.274

0.5%

1.0%

1.5%

0.3%

0.0%

Well, PECOTA won’t be the outlier this year.
14

2

2

3.8

1.9

1.9

.601

.596

67.8%

17.5%

85.3%

1.9%

0.0%

At this point the Dodgers are basically Sisyphus if Sisyphus got very slightly worse with each attempt.
15

2

2

1.9

1.7

1.7

.429

.424

0.5%

0.9%

1.4%

0.4%

0.0%

Even Toys-R-Us found a way to get more in return for their offseason fire sale.
16

3

0

2.2

2.0

2.0

.641

.636

24.5%

21.0%

45.5%

-0.7%

0.0%

Ironic that a team named after the creation of beer is so reluctant to acquire decent pitchers.
17

2

1

2.6

2.8

2.7

.673

.677

14.4%

24.1%

38.5%

1.3%

0.0%

Seems like the Twins are awfully mad at Sisco for breaking up their no-hitter, but this is what happens when you leave things up to Chance.
18

2

2

2.2

2.3

2.3

.573

.578

63.2%

23.6%

86.7%

-1.9%

0.0%

Aaron Judge’s new nickname should be “Neil Gorsuch” since he’s a heavy-hitting righty who’s pretending he can man center.
19

2

1

2.0

2.2

2.1

.596

.591

16.1%

13.7%

29.8%

-3.1%

0.0%

Welcome, Anthony Swarzak! How are you enjoying your new career as a Mets pitc ... oh. Oh no.
20

1

3

1.2

1.5

1.6

.402

.407

1.5%

7.3%

8.8%

-1.8%

0.0%

It’s always tough when your best pitcher hits the DL during Opening Week. Especially when that pitcher is only in Double-A.
21

1

2

0.5

0.6

0.6

.362

.357

15.0%

12.1%

27.1%

-0.8%

0.0%

Rick Pitino thinks Gabe Kapler is pulling out his best assets too early.
22

3

0

2.0

1.5

1.5

.571

.566

8.1%

12.1%

20.2%

4.6%

0.0%

I had a pretty edgy joke with boom-or-bust potential here, but ultimately decided to settle for this much safer, lamer joke instead.
23

0

3

0.8

1.0

1.0

.342

.337

0.5%

1.9%

2.4%

0.1%

0.0%

So yes, lots of people poked fun at the Padres for signing Eric Hosmer this offseason, but at least people were referencing the Padres.
24

2

1

1.6

2.0

1.9

.562

.567

5.8%

20.6%

26.3%

3.7%

0.0%

It’s no surprise that Mike Zunino ended up injured, what with all that time he spends around Mariners pitchers and all.
25

2

2

0.2

2.1

2.1

.453

.448

8.8%

20.1%

28.8%

-2.0%

0.0%

Even without Madison Bumgarner for a few months, the revamped Giants look like one of the three or four deadliest teams heading into the 2013 season.
26

1

2

1.0

0.8

0.9

.415

.410

18.1%

18.5%

36.7%

2.4%

0.0%

Guess we ought to call the Cardinals “The Little Dutch Boys” now that they’ve acquired Holland and all.
27

1

3

1.8

1.2

1.3

.422

.426

5.6%

18.5%

24.1%

-3.7%

0.0%

Folks we haven’t seen anyone blow their chances with a talented Archer like this since Jon Snow.
28

1

3

0.9

0.8

0.9

.342

.347

0.8%

5.7%

6.5%

-1.4%

0.0%

Let’s see how the Rangers new strategy of *squints* acquiring a ton of homer-prone pitchers in an extreme fly-ball era plays out.
29

2

2

1.8

1.7

1.7

.471

.476

4.0%

16.5%

20.5%

2.2%

0.0%

Apparently “Blue Jays infielder” is French Canadian for “Mets pitcher.”
30

3

0

2.3

2.1

2.1

.669

.665

62.4%

12.1%

74.5%

3.0%

0.0%

For once the Nationals are the only thing in Washington ... that isn’t broken! [697k likes, 252 favs, 53k replies].