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‘Sheet cells zing, are you listening,
In B12, Excel’s arithmeticin’
A beautiful sight,
We're happy tonight.
Walking in a spreadsheet wonderland.

Gone away is MS Word,
Here to stay is COUPNCD()
He returns an integer,
As we administer,
Walking in a spreadsheet wonderland.

In the table we can build a bar chart,
Then pretend that he is Miner Brown
He'll say: You got pitching?
We'll say: No man,
But you can do the job
When you're in town.

Later on, we'll use GNU R,
As we dream of Rob Neyer
To face unafraid,
The plans that we've made,
Walking in a spreadsheet wonderland.

In the meadow we can build a pie chart,
And pretend he’s won the triple crown
We'll have lots of fun with mister pie chart,
Until the other bloggers knock him down.

All those rows, ain't it thrilling,
Though SQL's more fullfilling
We'll frolic and play, the sabermetric way,
Walking in a spreadsheet wonderland.

Thank you for reading

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I feel like I just watched someone from "Real Genius" crack.

The Rob Neyer line gave me the lolz.
Nicely done, Colin. Have to admit I'm a bit worried though. Either need to cut down on the meds or amp them up. :)