From: [NAME REDACTED], Director of Marketing, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
Subject: Re.: 2013 promotions schedule
Just got the 2013 promotions sched. Not pleased. Chia heads and baseball cards are borrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrring. And the chia things are $$$!
Scrap it and start over. Let’s have some new ideas. Think outside the dang box for a change!
p.s. Budget still very much in the box. Sponsors won’t pay more than $1/patron. Get creative!
Sent from my Droid RAZR MAXX
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
To: [NAME REDACTED], Director of Marketing
Subject: re. Re.: 2013 promotions schedule
Great news! I’m excited about the prospect of some new giveaway ideas!!
I’m partial to the “wearable blanket” (the unbranded version of the Snuggie or Slanket) or possibly some Thunder Sticks! (Although that might also be a brand name; I’m confident we can find an unbranded version of those as well, if that’s an issue!)
[NAME REDACTED]
Assistant Marketing Director, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
Going all the way in 2013!
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Director of Marketing, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
Subject: Re.: re. Re.: 2013 promotions schedule
Dammit, that’s so far in the box that we might as well just hand out boxes at the turnstiles! Ask those interns. We need a totally fresh perspective here.
Sent from my Droid RAZR MAXX
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
To: interns@
Subject: New ideas for 2013 promotions
Hey guys (and girl!), put your thinking caps on, because I’ve got an assignment for you!
I took a look at the promotions calendar for next year, and frankly it looks pretty mundane. Let’s see if we can come up with some fresh new ideas, OK? So no Thunder Sticks or Slankets, ok? (LOL!)
[NAME REDACTED]
Assistant Marketing Director, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
Going all the way in 2013!
***
From: Hunter
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
Beer
Sent directly from my brain
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
To: Hunter, interns@
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
Haha! Definitely outside the box, Hunter! But it’s got to be suitable for patrons of all ages!
[NAME REDACTED]
Assistant Marketing Director, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
Going all the way in 2013!
***
From: Hunter
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
Nonalcoholic beer
Sent directly from my brain
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
To: Hunter, interns@
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
OK, you got me! :))
But no, nothing that can be used as a projectile either. Oh, and the budget per piece has got to be around a buck. Can’t wait to hear what you guys come up with!!
[NAME REDACTED]
Assistant Marketing Director, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
Going all the way in 2013!
***
From: Elena
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
What about, like, hand sanitizer? The stadium is always so gross. I’m afraid to touch anything. Eww.
Elena _________
__________ Class of ‘15!
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
To: Elena, interns@
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
Good one, Elena! I’ll put that in the “maybe” column!
And keep ‘em comin’!!!
[NAME REDACTED]
Assistant Marketing Director, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
Going all the way in 2013!
***
From: Hunter
To: Eelena, [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
Cool, you can totally drink those
Sent directly from my brain
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
To: Hunter, Elena, interns@
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
OK, moving the hand sanitizer from “Maybe” to “No.”
Ideas, people! Let’s hear ‘em!! ^_^
[NAME REDACTED]
Assistant Marketing Director, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
Going all the way in 2013!
***
From: Casey
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
What about toothpicks? We could get these as cheap as $.03 if we ordered 50,000
http://www.staplespromotionalproducts.com/ProductDetail.aspx?id=9388
-Casey
***
From: Hunter
To: Casey
Subject: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
ur an idiot
Sent directly from my brain
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
To: Casey, interns@
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
OK, not a bad idea per se, but let’s try and come up with items that are a little more compelling shall we?
What about this guy? http://www.staplespromotionalproducts.com/ProductDetail.aspx?id=949 He’s a flash drive! Maybe we could get one who looks like a baseball player!
[NAME REDACTED]
Assistant Marketing Director, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
Going all the way in 2013!
***
From: Hunter
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
flashing shot glass
Sent directly from my brain
***
From: Elena
To: Hunter
Subject: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
That is sooooo cool!
Elena _________
__________ Class of ‘15!
***
From: Casey
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
How about these bracelets?? I like how this one says “GOT R DID!” Just like our team “got r did” last season!
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
To: Casey, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
Now we’re cookin’, Casey! Good one!
Hey, what do you guys think of these cool “Risky Business” shades, huh??
http://www.4imprint.com/product/109494/Risky-Business-Sunglasses-Opaque
[NAME REDACTED]
Assistant Marketing Director, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
Going all the way in 2013!
***
From: Hunter
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
what’s a risky business
Sent directly from my brain
***
From: Elena
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
I have no idea what that is lol
Elena _________
__________ Class of ‘15!
***
From: Casey
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
I thought this was really cool. It’s a ruler AND an “oven rack jockey” in one!
We could put a cool slogan on it, like “Do You Measure Up, or Are You Too Hot to Handle?!?”
Just a thought!
-Casey
***
From: Hunter
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
lol wtf
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http://www.staplespromotionalproducts.com/ProductDetail.aspx?id=6836
Sent directly from my brain
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
To: Casey, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
Hey, I like what DQ has done here: http://www.promonorm.com/productdetail/productdetail.aspx?DPSV_Id=77194&pSRVC_Id=41&id=302021
Price point is too high, though — can you guys find something in our budget?
[NAME REDACTED]
Assistant Marketing Director, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
Going all the way in 2013!
***
From: Hunter
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
all this is under $1
http://promos-unlimited.logomall.com/featuredproduct/index.aspx?DPSV_Id=677354
maybe we can get [REDACTED] shopping bags that our season ticket holders could wear over their heads. not sure if they do quantities that small tho, heh
http://promos-unlimited.logomall.com/productdetail/productdetail.aspx?DPSV_Id=677354&pSRVC_Id=41&id=295146
Sent directly from my brain
***
From: Elena
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
We could make highlight reel DVDs and add scratch n’ sniff smells of the staff bathrooms, the locker rooms, and the grease trap at the concessions stand. So gross.
***
From: Casey
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
Stress ball? http://www.4imprint.com/product/16018/Solid-Color-Stress-Ball
Egg hat? http://promos-unlimited.logomall.com/productdetail/productdetail.aspx?DPSV_Id=153316
Neck wallet? http://www.4imprint.com/product/5245/Neck-Wallet
-Casey
***
From: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director
To: interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
Good job, everyone. Good effort. I have a pounding headache and I’m going to take the afternoon off.
Let’s put a pin in this for now and revisit tomorrow.
[NAME REDACTED]
Assistant Marketing Director, [TEAM NAME REDACTED]
Going all the way in 2013!
***
From: Hunter
To: [NAME REDACTED], Assistant Marketing Director, interns@
Subject: re.: re.: Re.: New ideas for 2013 promotions
you could probably grow weed in this
http://promos-unlimited.logomall.com/productdetail/productdetail.aspx?DPSV_Id=677353&pSRVC_Id=41&id=290285#
Sent directly from my brain
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That is the only time I can remember where the give away effected my decision on whether to go to game or not. So I would recommend a free cheese grater promotion.
Way better than the time I almost got into a fist-fight over a slanket.
A few years later I got into a season ticket pool and it happenned our seats were in the row in front of the player's wives. We went to this game where the give away was this crummy Trix rabbit T-shirt. It didn't have the Twins logo on it - just the Trix rabbit. Around the 5th or 6th inning, Paul Molitor's (then) wife comes down with two boxes of these T-shirts. She starts talking to one of the other wives about how they will make great gifts to various relatives. I thought the shirt was crummy as a giveaway - I can't imagine what a nephew of a HOF player would think of it getting one for their birthday. I much preferred he cheese grater...
This was soooooo much better.
Being in the marketing/advertising world, I can say that this article is sadly not that far off the mark.
Oh, and BTW, it is so true. I remember the porkpie hats the Mets gave away on Mothers' Day in the 70's and your mother refused to wear one. And the bats that used to go flying from the upper deck until they decided that slankets were safer in the air.
Risky Business and demographics...priceless. I do not envy these marketing goons. Their reputations are out here for everyone to loathe.
Good on ya, mate.