Everybody knows the inning ended after the third out. What this post presupposes is … maybe it didn't?

Umpire: Literally couldn't care less. Hang on. Let me try to care less. 
Umpire: /juxtaposes stakes of baseball game with reality of world where 170 million live on a dollar a day in China alone.
Umpire: No. Same. That ball was fair by the way. 
Umpire: I'm imagining a boat beyond the right field wall. A schooner.  

First baseman Mark Reynolds: /just wandering around wondering how long it will take for somebody, anybody in the game of baseball to notice that he is totally blind.

Second baseman Robert Andino: Just made a catch guys. Just recorded an out. At the highest level in the world, and just nailed that. 
Robert Andino: Kind of a big deal. 
Robert Andino: It'll never get better than this moment. 

Right fielder Chris Davis: Gum gum gum gum gum gum gum gum gum gum gonna get some
Chris Davis: Whooopps
Chris Davis: /veers toward infield
Chris Davis: Hey Robert Andino nice catch! I said nice catch. Just wanted to come in and say nice catch. 

Center fielder Adam Jones: /sneaks in from behind center-field wall
Adam Jones: I was here the whole time!
Adam Jones: But how many outs was that? Just want to make sure you know. 
Adam Jones: /smells like cigarettes

Catcher Ronny Paulino: ??? 
Ronny Paulino: ???
Ronny Paulino: ???
Ronny Paulino: !!!


These guys are the best in the world at what they do. The people who did the structural engineering for the building you're sitting in are also the best in the world at what they do. Cheers!

Thank you for reading

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See, this is funny. But when Starlin Castro forgets how many outs there are, he's the anti-christ.
Two differences:

#1 Castro thought there were three outs when there were more outs to play through, so he stopped paying attention. Meanwhile, the Orioles thought there was more outs left to play through and people were still manning their position, backing each other up, etc.

#2 There were no runners on base.

#3 Castro, in another incident, turning his back while the pitcher was pitching didn't help either. It's one thing if it's a once every year or two mistake, but Castro makes a mistake of some sort or another every month.

#4 Castro is young, the Orioles aren't.. so it's better he learns now then keeps his bad habits established. Ex. Alfonso Soriano.
You count significantly worse than Starlin Castro, sir. Two differences...

That's what I get for having an initial idea and getting more ideas mid-comment.

Though note, I kept writing till the ideas were over.

Starlin would've stopped at one idea.
Funniest thing I have ever read on BP. Great work.
Love the Tenenbaums reference.