On Wednesday, Adrian Beltre batted in the sixth inning. It went like this.
First pitch: Josh Hamilton nearly steals second.
Josh Hamilton was on the back-end of a double steal. He fell down. He returned to first base. That happens. But this is how far he got:
Seventy feet, you think? Maybe 60? Josh Hamilton stole 60 feet of a base? Then abandoned the plan and took the much-longer way to a base? Someday, Josh Hamilton is going to write his autobiography. It is going to be called Falling Down: How I Stumbled, Fell Down, But Picked Myself Up, Got To Safety And Came Out A Winner. Book reviewers will note that it doesn't mention any of his personal struggles, and is only one paragraph long.
And then: Adrian Beltre calls for appeal, loses appeal.
Adrian Beltre does this sometimes. Miguel Cabrera also does this. I like this move, usually. Usually Beltre does this when he thinks the home-plate umpire is going to ring him up swinging. In this case, he did it because?
Beltre: An appeal. It's my right!
Umpire: It is not your right.
Avila: It is not your right.
Beltre: Mandate. Commerce Clause.
Duane Below: WHAT'S TAKING SO LONG OVER THERE?
Avila: C'mon this game is so slow already. Can't we just get baseball over with?
Beltre: I insist.
Below: GIVE ME THE BALL BACK JERKS
First-base umpire: I'm on TV!
And then: Beltre and home-plate umpire Paul Emmel discuss the count.
The scoreboard lists it at 2-1. It is not 2-1, Emmel tells Beltre. It is not 2-1? Beltre asks. No, it is not 2-1, the umpire reiterates. I thought it was 2-1? It's not 2-1. So it's not 2-1? It's not 2-1. The first pitch was a strike. OK then I guess it's 1-2? No, you are out. The second and third pitches also were strikes. That scoreboard is so far off that we should probably not consult it any longer. That scoreboard is displaying a Euro Cup score.
And Adrian Beltre was out. There was no fourth pitch. The rest of the game was normal.