Quantcast

Prospectus Hit List for September 5



by Matthew Kory

Hit List for September 4 Hit List for September 6
Hit List updates are published Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, starting April 2, 2014. Data presented here is based on games through the day prior to publication.
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.

Look, if you had one shot, one opportunity, To read every joke you ever wanted, one Hit List, would you capture it or just let it slip?

RkTmWLW1W2W3HLFAHLFWin Div%Win WC%Playoff%1-Day 7-Day
1

80

59

78.4

77.6

76.2

.562

.581

51.4%

45.4%

96.8%

1.2%

12.6%

If the A’s want a new stadium and this San Jose thing isn’t working out, might I say they’re doing amazing things with paper mache these days.
2

75

64

70.2

63.5

64.7

.492

.512

0.1%

10.5%

10.6%

0.1%

6.9%

Normally the Yankees would erect a statue of Derek Jeter, but since Derek Jeter himself is already fulfilling that role...
3

78

62

80.8

81.8

82.0

.576

.556

13.0%

85.0%

98.0%

-0.8%

2.6%

In any 16-inning game you’re going to get some awful lines, but it’s hard to beat Joey Votto’s 0-for-7 with three strikeouts and – cherry on top! -- an error in the field.
4

84

57

86.2

85.4

84.9

.604

.623

95.4%

4.1%

99.6%

0.3%

1.6%

In last night’s game against the Tigers the Red Sox scored 20 runs. In six previous games against the TIgers, the Red Sox had scored 23.
5

81

58

76.1

78.4

79.2

.566

.546

46.0%

53.8%

99.9%

-0.1%

1.1%

Justin Morneau is hitting .462/.588/.538 since coming to Pittsburgh. I’m sorry but I’m going to ruin your morning coffee and call that unsustainable.
6

81

59

85.5

92.4

92.0

.627

.645

99.4%

0.3%

99.7%

-0.2%

1.0%

Every Tigers pitcher last night gave up A) at least one home run, B) more runs than innings pitched, and in two of four cases, C) more runs than batters faced.
7

80

59

84.0

79.0

78.6

.578

.559

41.0%

58.8%

99.8%

0.3%

0.5%

Cardinals season summed up in five words: injury replacement hits two homers
8

83

56

77.8

80.7

78.5

.575

.556

100.0%

0.0%

100.0%

0.0%

0.4%

Tired of winning, the Dodgers have taken on a new challenge: losing! Last night they won! By which I mean they lost!
9

85

54

84.8

84.6

81.6

.604

.585

100.0%

0.0%

100.0%

0.0%

0.0%

The Braves are pretty good but baseball is a delicate soup where one off flavor can ruin everything else done perfectly. Speaking of, Kameron Loe’s five runs, three walks, two homers allowed, and no strikeouts in 4 1/3 innings say hi.
10

63

77

57.0

55.9

57.9

.417

.398

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Take the first letter of the last name from each player in last night’s Phillies lineup and it spells “Hrurrambh” which, I think, sums up their season quite well.
11

62

77

58.8

59.6

60.1

.433

.413

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Moving the fences in at Petco Park has sure helped the Padres. Last year they were 23rd in runs scored, but this year they’re 26th! Wait, is that really in the script?
12

63

75

65.4

63.8

63.4

.463

.443

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

The Mets catcher has an apostrophe in his last name. That is literally the most interesting Mets-related thing I could find.
13

61

77

59.9

62.2

62.2

.444

.464

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Twins starting left fielder Darin Mastroianni has more letters in his name than hits on the season. Times two.
14

62

77

60.9

65.4

66.2

.458

.438

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Pablo Sandoval’s three homers are like a professor giving you that recommendation two days after you already got turned down for the job.
15

64

74

66.6

68.4

67.5

.483

.503

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Now that the Angels can legally drop “of Anaheim” from their name, they’re taking suggestions. So, how does “the Los Angeles Angels of Cheese” sound?
16

66

75

68.8

68.4

65.5

.476

.457

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

What did Josh Outman do? He got an out, man.
17

60

79

62.6

64.9

66.5

.457

.437

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Khris Davis homered. This season people named “C/Khris Davis” have hit 56 homers, more than any other name.
18

52

86

55.6

50.9

51.7

.381

.362

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

The Marlins are last in home runs, last in hits, last in batting average, last in on-base percentage, and last in runs scored. There was a joke here somewhere but now I just feel bad.
19

46

93

49.9

44.7

46.7

.337

.355

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Supposedly 14,869 people attended a September day game between the Twins and Astros. If that’s true, I’ll eat all 1,869 of them.
20

59

80

63.6

66.6

66.4

.460

.440

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Getting Daniel Bard was a low-cost, no-risk way to add terrible to the 40-man roster without having to give up any terrible in return.
21

56

82

59.9

60.0

59.4

.426

.446

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

If Adam Dunn retires, the White Sox comment will go blank for an entire season in memorium. Or until my editor calls me and demands I stop submitting 29 comments for a 30-comment column.
22

64

76

65.1

63.0

65.1

.459

.479

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Now that Jose Bautista has been shut down for the season, what will the Blue Jays do? Correct answer: continue finishing in last place.
23

63

76

58.5

62.8

62.0

.443

.463

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

It was Taijuan Walker day in Seattle which I assume was celebrated by tying one on while walking and not watching the Mariners. Most of that was a joke.
24

72

67

74.4

66.5

67.0

.503

.523

0.1%

0.7%

0.8%

-0.4%

-0.1%

If the Royals lose out they can still lose 90 games and leave the requisite bad taste in their fans mouths. Come on, Royals!
25

70

68

69.1

67.8

67.8

.498

.478

0.0%

0.6%

0.6%

0.3%

-2.2%

After Willie Bloomquist scored the winning run, the Diamondbacks dumped gum on his head. This is a clear escalation of the celebration rules. I fear for the children!
26

80

59

78.3

77.7

76.5

.562

.582

48.6%

46.0%

94.6%

-2.4%

-2.3%

I’m not sure what’s more impressive, that A.J. Pierzynski has posted an on-base percentage above .340 once in 16 major league seasons, or that I spelled his name correctly on the first try.
27

71

68

67.9

69.4

68.5

.498

.478

0.0%

1.7%

1.7%

0.3%

-2.4%

What do the Nats need? More Zimmermenn!
28

73

65

73.1

70.3

71.7

.522

.542

0.1%

5.6%

5.7%

-4.1%

-3.1%

Adam Jones is one homer away from 30, one RBI away from 100, and one walk away from 20.
29

74

65

72.5

71.0

72.7

.522

.542

0.5%

12.8%

13.3%

1.2%

-6.1%

The Indians brought a live chicken with them to batting practice. One of their announcers commented that that was what the team was all about. I don’t even know anymore.
30

77

61

73.9

81.4

82.0

.570

.589

4.3%

74.6%

79.0%

4.2%

-10.5%

If the Rays don’t make the playoffs, Joe Maddon may just move his furniture to one corner of the living room, crouch in the corner and wait.

Matthew Kory is an author of Baseball Prospectus. 
Click here to see Matthew's other articles. You can contact Matthew by clicking here


2 comments have been left for this article.
BillWW

That Jeter joke is older than John Sterling.

Sep 05, 2013 10:26 AM
up_image

0

down_image
 
mhmckay

I thought the Phillies line was awesome

Sep 05, 2013 16:53 PM
up_image

+1

down_image
 
Sorry, fantasy subscribers cannot comment on exclusive premium content.
<< Previous Article
Baseball Prospectus Ne... (09/05)
<< Previous Column
Premium Article The Prospectus Hit Lis... (09/04)
Next Column >>
Premium Article The Prospectus Hit Lis... (09/06)
Next Article >>
Premium Article Transaction Analysis: ... (09/05)

RECENTLY AT BASEBALL PROSPECTUS
Fantasy Article Fantasy Starting Pitcher Planner: Week 22
Premium Article The View from the Loge Level: You Gotta Have...
Fantasy Article Fantasy Freestyle: Adjusting for Era
Premium Article Minor League Update: Games of Thursday, Augu...
Premium Article What You Need to Know: August 22, 2014
Premium Article Raising Aces: Police and Thieves
Premium Article Painting the Black: A Marlins Fastball, A Tw...

MORE FROM SEPTEMBER 5, 2013 09:09 AM
Premium Article Skewed Left: The Literal Rise of the Shortst...
Premium Article What You Need to Know: Night of the Long Fli...
Premium Article Transaction Analysis: Will Amenable
Baseball Prospectus News: Baseball Prospectu...
Fantasy Article Free Agent Watch: Week 23
Fantasy Article Bullpen Report: Examining Trends
Premium Article Daily Roundup: Around the League: September ...

MORE BY MATTHEW KORY
2013-09-16 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Monday, September 1...
2013-09-12 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Thursday, September...
2013-09-10 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Tuesday, September ...
2013-09-05 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Thursday, September...
2013-09-03 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Tuesday, September ...
2013-08-30 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Friday, Aug. 30
2013-08-29 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Thursday, August 29
More...

MORE THE PROSPECTUS HIT LIST
2013-09-10 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Tuesday, September ...
2013-09-09 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Monday, September 9
2013-09-06 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Friday, September 6
2013-09-05 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Thursday, September...
2013-09-04 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Wednesday, Septembe...
2013-09-03 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Tuesday, September ...
2013-08-30 - Premium Article The Prospectus Hit List: Friday, Aug. 30
More...