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Prospectus Hit List for June 27



by Matthew Kory

Hit List for June 26 Hit List for June 28
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.

This Hit List is *literally* what it sounds like when doves cry.

RkTmWLW1W2W3HLFAHLFWin Div%Win WC% Playoff%1-Day7-Day
1

48

30

51.0

49.4

48.2

.583

.564

49.2%

45.7%

94.8%

-1.0%

-0.8%

For one day at least the Cardinals have to share the division lead with the Pirates so remember, no fighting or I won't let you watch TV.
2

42

34

45.4

51.1

50.7

.596

.615

85.0%

6.3%

91.2%

-2.1%

-1.9%

The Tigers can't seem to beat the Angels, which when you think about where the teams are in the standings, is cute.
3

48

30

43.3

42.1

43.4

.538

.518

32.9%

56.7%

89.6%

2.7%

25.0%

Take that gum out of your mouth, swallow that milk, and sit down: the Pirates have the best record in baseball.
4

45

34

46.0

46.1

44.6

.542

.522

80.5%

5.9%

86.5%

-3.2%

-5.3%

B.J. Upton went 0-for-4 dropping his average to about the fourth concentric circle.
5

47

33

47.9

46.7

46.7

.562

.582

59.2%

25.3%

84.5%

2.0%

3.8%

Twelve strikeouts and no walks in seven innings begs the question: Is John Lackey the ace of the Red Sox? (This would have been a joke a year ago. Times they are a-chang'n!)
6

45

34

44.7

45.7

45.7

.562

.542

18.0%

66.2%

84.2%

-1.8%

-7.5%

The Reds struck out seven times last night. Jay Bruce accounted for four of them. It would have been more but the game ended.
7

45

33

42.1

42.9

43.1

.554

.573

57.8%

25.2%

83.1%

4.0%

14.9%

Adrian Beltre is motivated to know you watch GIFs of him freaking out when people touch his head.
8

46

34

45.8

46.1

44.4

.546

.566

40.4%

32.5%

72.9%

2.6%

-1.3%

The A's lead baseball in walks, a fact which, if you just woke up from a decade-long coma, makes perfect sense.
9

41

36

40.6

39.1

39.2

.518

.498

43.6%

5.2%

48.9%

-4.5%

-0.4%

It would be a lot easier to make fun of the Diamondbacks if they weren't in first place. (Silly uniforms!)
10

42

35

38.2

35.3

35.8

.522

.542

18.8%

29.6%

48.4%

-10.6%

-8.8%

The Yankees announced the team doctor has recommended Mark Teixeira undergo season-ending surgery on his wrist but curiously don't mention how this will affect Tim Tebow.
11

41

38

41.4

44.2

45.2

.537

.557

11.3%

24.8%

36.0%

-4.3%

6.0%

Wil Myers is hitting .268/.286/.439. Tampa wins the trade! (Shh! Don't tell those KC people!)
12

40

37

40.3

38.9

39.5

.504

.524

13.2%

16.9%

30.1%

4.8%

5.1%

If you don't have Scott Kazmir on your fantasy team this is the time to pick him up, and if you already do have him then this is the time to trade him because, come on, it's Scott Freakin Kazmir!
13

43

36

40.8

41.1

41.8

.499

.519

8.4%

20.5%

28.9%

-2.7%

-14.4%

Jim Johnson's fifth blown save tied him for the league lead. Asked about it he said, "I don't think about individual stats much, but it's an honor to be mentioned in the same class as wait what?"
14

39

38

35.3

34.7

35.0

.495

.475

15.9%

9.4%

25.4%

4.7%

4.3%

Rookie Anthony Rendon had three more hits and is now hitting... well, this is a bit embarrassing. The Nationals calculators don't go past .299.
15

38

40

36.8

39.5

40.3

.503

.483

18.1%

2.4%

20.6%

-0.2%

-18.5%

There's no shame in getting Puig'd. It happens to all of us eventually.
16

35

42

34.0

36.3

36.6

.519

.499

17.3%

1.9%

19.2%

5.6%

7.7%

I could probably write Yasiel Puig here three times and my editor would probably be fine with it but I'm not that desperate... Puig Puig Puig!
17

39

40

42.2

44.6

42.9

.499

.479

12.9%

2.3%

15.2%

-2.4%

-1.9%

Tyler Colvin went 0-for-4 with four strikeouts. On his way out of the park his girlfriend called to break up with him, he dropped his cell phone, he tripped over it, fell, and was then eaten by an escaped bear from the zoo. Tough night.
18

39

38

38.7

35.8

37.1

.495

.515

2.4%

8.1%

10.5%

2.9%

2.7%

Both Jose Reyes and R.A. Dickey returned on the same day, Reyes from the DL and Dickey from some place where bad pitchers go to drink Buds and commiserate.
19

39

40

37.0

36.5

36.5

.471

.451

8.0%

0.8%

8.9%

-1.1%

-1.7%

The top of the Padres 13th inning in San Diego: hit by pitch, fly out, fly out, walk, two base error, doesn't matter they lost.
20

35

43

38.5

40.4

39.2

.528

.548

1.7%

7.0%

8.8%

2.1%

-2.5%

The first four Angels pitchers through the first seven innings: two walks, one strikeout.
21

38

41

33.6

34.3

33.9

.459

.439

2.9%

1.8%

4.7%

1.3%

-0.9%

Jonathan Papelbon saved the game in inning 13. Lucky Charlie Manuel held him out until Philadelphia got the lead!
22

36

39

38.4

32.1

33.0

.468

.488

1.5%

2.8%

4.2%

1.8%

-2.1%

James Shields has a 2.92 ERA in 16 starts. Kansas City wins the trade! (Shh! Don't tell those Tampa people!)
23

31

43

32.5

31.8

31.5

.460

.440

0.6%

0.4%

1.0%

0.2%

0.3%

Shaun Marcum finally won a game, bringing his record to 1-9. This matters if you are Shaun Marcum. Also I understand Marcum's parrot Mr. Peepers is a big Hit List fan.
24

34

40

34.1

34.4

35.0

.439

.459

0.2%

0.6%

0.9%

-0.3%

-0.6%

Getting swept by the Marlins is the baseball equivalent of getting beaten in a race by your own hindquarters. In other words, you have to not want it badly.
25

32

44

33.5

35.1

36.3

.466

.446

0.0%

0.6%

0.6%

-0.1%

-0.1%

At 32-44 the Brewers may be looking to trade talent, but like their namesake, drinking from their cup will likely end up with you out of money and with a headache.
26

32

44

36.1

38.8

39.1

.478

.458

0.0%

0.6%

0.6%

-0.1%

-0.3%

The Cubs were 2-for-13 with runners in scoring position which is not awful enough to warrant actual attention but just bad enough to engender pity.
27

34

45

32.3

34.5

34.9

.453

.473

0.1%

0.3%

0.3%

-0.1%

-0.8%

Raul Ibanez has 18 home runs. Raul Ibanez. Has 18 home runs. Raul. Ibanez. Has. 18...
28

32

43

33.3

33.0

30.9

.446

.466

0.1%

0.1%

0.3%

0.0%

-0.2%

The Awful Noises Hall of Fame includes crumbling buildings, air raid horns, dog farts, and now the sound of Hawk Harrelson announcing anything remotely construed to be anti-White Sox.
29

30

49

29.0

24.9

26.6

.368

.386

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Statistically the Astros should never beat St. Louis. Last night the Astros beat St. Louis. Ergo, statistics are meaningless!
30

27

50

28.4

24.9

24.8

.375

.356

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

The Marlins win puts them at 13-9 in June and assures them of a winning record this month, which reminds me, better get to digging that emergency shelter.