Prospectus Hit List for June 5
Hit List for June 4
Hit List for June 6
Teams are ordered based on Adjusted Hit List Factor, a computer generated number, and the author isn't responsible for the order of the teams.
Rk | Tm | W | L | W1 | W2 | W3 | HLF | AHLF | Win Div% | Win WC% | Playoff% | 1-Day | 7-Day |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
1 | 22 | 35 | 23.0 | 23.5 | 24.9 | .446 | .426 | 0.0% | 0.6% | 0.6% | 0.1% | -0.3% | |
That's right. Keep inserting Yuniesky Betancourt into walkoff hit situations and inflate his trade value. Somebody will bite. | |||||||||||||
2 | 21 | 38 | 20.5 | 18.2 | 20.5 | .361 | .380 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
The six-game winning streak is over, but the memories will last a lifetime. The vivid, bone-chilling memories. | |||||||||||||
3 | 16 | 43 | 19.8 | 16.8 | 16.6 | .347 | .329 | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | 0.0% | |
Edgar Olmos allowed four runs but they were unearned because of a fielding error by Edgar Olmos, which is why the SEC should start investigating ERA fraud. | |||||||||||||
4 | 23 | 33 | 27.8 | 29.0 | 29.0 | .484 | .464 | 0.1% | 1.8% | 1.9% | -0.0% | 0.2% | |
DHing Alfonso Soriano is no doubt a blatant attempt to showcase to American League teams his versatility before the trade deadline. | |||||||||||||
5 | 24 | 34 | 24.9 | 24.2 | 25.5 | .462 | .482 | 0.1% | 0.8% | 0.9% | -0.7% | -1.4% | |
Only one of their batters walked yesterday and it was Josh Johnson. | |||||||||||||
6 | 26 | 29 | 26.2 | 25.2 | 26.3 | .441 | .461 | 0.5% | 0.7% | 1.2% | 0.0% | 0.9% | |
Mike Pelfrey's season ERA is 6.66, in case you were wondering whose blood-curdling voice that was haunting your dreams. | |||||||||||||
7 | 26 | 33 | 25.0 | 27.9 | 28.5 | .464 | .484 | 0.5% | 1.3% | 1.7% | 0.4% | -0.3% | |
With the way he's hitting, it's as if someone is telling Raul Ibaņez before every at bat that he's pinch-hitting for Alex Rodriguez. | |||||||||||||
8 | 24 | 32 | 23.3 | 23.0 | 21.7 | .440 | .460 | 0.5% | 1.1% | 1.6% | -0.9% | -7.7% | |
Jake Peavy had an early exit in Seattle, but it was on the West coast, so according to Chicago time it was right on schedule. | |||||||||||||
9 | 23 | 32 | 26.1 | 21.8 | 22.2 | .448 | .468 | 0.6% | 0.7% | 1.3% | -0.9% | -1.5% | |
Yesterday was the first time they couldn't muster more than four hits against the Twins since 2007, when Scott Baker one-hit them. Impress your co-workers with this one. | |||||||||||||
10 | 22 | 33 | 22.2 | 22.1 | 21.6 | .440 | .421 | 0.6% | 0.7% | 1.4% | -0.2% | -0.9% | |
Omar Quintinalla went 2-for-3 with a double, triple, walk and two RBIs, and is worth five times as much as Bobby Bonilla, I am assuming. | |||||||||||||
11 | 26 | 32 | 25.7 | 25.4 | 25.3 | .456 | .436 | 1.5% | 0.7% | 2.2% | -0.7% | -1.6% | |
Kyle Blanks has a chance to be the best player to wear 88 in history. Albert Belle doesn't count. | |||||||||||||
12 | 29 | 30 | 25.0 | 25.6 | 25.0 | .461 | .441 | 3.0% | 5.1% | 8.1% | -0.9% | 1.0% | |
John Mayberry was going to send Phillies fans home happy one way or the other: either a walkoff grand slam or coupons for free cookies. | |||||||||||||
13 | 26 | 33 | 28.0 | 29.7 | 28.3 | .519 | .539 | 3.0% | 11.4% | 14.5% | 1.6% | -6.9% | |
Before that go-ahead home run, Albert Pujols' last three dingers against the Cubs were all off Rodrigo Lopez. Remember him? Ask him if he remembers those home runs. | |||||||||||||
14 | 33 | 25 | 31.1 | 31.4 | 31.5 | .508 | .528 | 8.6% | 19.3% | 27.9% | 3.7% | 11.2% | |
Now with 26 doubles, how exciting would it be if Manny Machado broke the single-season doubles record, compared to the home run record? I guess half as exciting. | |||||||||||||
15 | 35 | 24 | 31.5 | 30.3 | 30.9 | .522 | .502 | 8.8% | 42.8% | 51.6% | -4.8% | -3.3% | |
It's impossible for Jason Grilli to allow earned runs. He must have collected all seven Chaos Emeralds. | |||||||||||||
16 | 31 | 28 | 32.5 | 34.0 | 33.1 | .507 | .487 | 11.7% | 7.1% | 18.8% | 3.1% | 0.0% | |
Yesterday, Josh Outman was credited with the win and Rex Brothers earned the save. I saw the Outman Brothers back in '81. Great show. | |||||||||||||
17 | 31 | 26 | 30.6 | 31.4 | 32.1 | .537 | .557 | 13.0% | 28.8% | 41.9% | -3.6% | 3.2% | |
Matt Moore went two innings and gave up six walks. The only other Rays pitcher to do that was Victor Zambrano on May 15, 2004. Fun fact: Victor Martinez was in the other lineup both times. | |||||||||||||
18 | 30 | 28 | 30.4 | 30.1 | 30.8 | .508 | .528 | 13.1% | 15.0% | 28.2% | -3.0% | -4.3% | |
If Mike Aviles is thrown out of a game that already ended ... I forget the question | |||||||||||||
19 | 29 | 29 | 26.0 | 25.5 | 25.9 | .494 | .474 | 13.5% | 16.8% | 30.4% | 1.3% | -11.4% | |
If you want to stay abreast of all their roster changes this week, consider something simpler like Vulcan chess. | |||||||||||||
20 | 25 | 32 | 24.2 | 26.4 | 26.4 | .513 | .493 | 15.3% | 7.1% | 22.3% | 2.4% | -4.0% | |
Yasiel Puig may be the perfect prospect in that his name boasts a nearly barren source of puns. | |||||||||||||
21 | 31 | 27 | 27.6 | 29.4 | 30.8 | .510 | .490 | 23.5% | 10.0% | 33.5% | 1.1% | 3.3% | |
Sergio Romo may as well operate a White Castle because he serves nothing but sliders. | |||||||||||||
22 | 35 | 25 | 34.1 | 35.3 | 34.1 | .548 | .567 | 28.8% | 34.3% | 63.1% | -3.2% | 11.5% | |
Sean Doolittle faced three batters and they all scored and nope not gonna make fun of his name here. | |||||||||||||
23 | 33 | 25 | 30.0 | 28.0 | 28.4 | .540 | .560 | 29.5% | 33.6% | 63.1% | 3.0% | -12.0% | |
Lyle Overbay played right field in Yankee Stadium, but it's no big deal since it's basically three giant steps behind first base. | |||||||||||||
24 | 36 | 23 | 37.2 | 37.5 | 36.4 | .591 | .571 | 39.4% | 48.4% | 87.8% | -3.0% | 0.2% | |
Once in a while, Sam LeCure has a bad game like he did yesterday, but it's usually just a placebo. | |||||||||||||
25 | 33 | 25 | 31.7 | 32.0 | 32.2 | .539 | .519 | 48.0% | 12.4% | 60.4% | 1.8% | 3.0% | |
B.J. Upton is fixed, and all it took was weeks of questioning his contract. | |||||||||||||
26 | 36 | 23 | 36.8 | 37.1 | 36.5 | .578 | .597 | 48.8% | 29.8% | 78.6% | 3.8% | 9.7% | |
Ted Williams now has as many career hits as Ichiro, which makes me wish Ted Williams would have gone by his first name only, if for no other reason than to preemptively steal it away from that confounded bear movie. | |||||||||||||
27 | 38 | 20 | 38.7 | 36.3 | 35.4 | .588 | .569 | 51.7% | 39.8% | 91.5% | -2.3% | 3.2% | |
Matt Carpenter was hit three times yesterday, the first time that has happened to a Cardinal. Maybe he shouldn't stand so close. | |||||||||||||
28 | 35 | 22 | 33.6 | 33.1 | 33.1 | .570 | .590 | 67.7% | 17.6% | 85.2% | -3.1% | -1.2% | |
They allowed a run in every inning except for the inning David Murphy pitched. Know what I'm thinking? That's right: French toast sticks. | |||||||||||||
29 | 36 | 22 | 35.6 | 35.2 | 33.9 | .559 | .539 | 82.9% | 6.6% | 89.5% | 2.3% | 10.6% | |
They already have more stolen bases in June (three) than they had in May (two). | |||||||||||||
30 | 31 | 25 | 35.6 | 39.1 | 38.6 | .610 | .629 | 85.3% | 5.5% | 90.8% | 3.0% | -1.2% | |
On a scale from one to grandmother, how warm do you think a Prince Fielder hug feels? |
Look: there's just no way you know ALL of these fun facts and have heard ALL of these jokes, right?