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April 2, 2014

Fantasy Freestyle

Now is the Season of My Discontent

by Mike Gianella

The day is done. The last player has been taken on reserve, the teams have been entered into the league’s stat service website, and the season is about the get underway. Everyone is excited for the potential his roster contains, the upside that his last one-dollar hitter or 23rd-round pick provides, and the idea that this is the year that he will take home the title.

Not me. I stare bleakly into nothingness (or—in this case—the now partially stocked bar in my brother-in-law’s basement). I’m afraid to look down at the spreadsheet I was using to track my auction, worried to see what four months of preparation and planning have wrought, afraid to face the inevitable, crushing realization that I’m going to have to face sooner rather than than later.

I hate my team.

These words are verboten in any kind of post-auction mortem. Everyone likes his team coming out of his auction, believes that he has put together the best fantasy team in the history of fantasy sports, and thinks that he is Branch Rickey and Billy Beane rolled into one.

Not me. I hate my team.

It isn’t a bad team. There is a decent amount of balance, a starter at every position except for my two $1 catchers, and six quality starting pitchers who should provide steady if not….

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11 comments have been left for this article. (Click to hide comments)

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Apr 02, 2014 03:18 AM
rating: -3

You know, as a Boston fan, I've gotten used to this approach, watching Belicheck build a winning Patriots roster for a decade based on Tom Brady + ... And, even closer to my heart, watching the 2013 Red Sox "miss out" on the sexy free agents like Josh Hamilton and Zach Grienke, plus trade away our "stars" like Beckett and AGonz and Carl Crawford -- and then win a World Series. I can tell you -- winning is a satisfaction of its own. Now, having your "nobodies" finish 7th -- that's no fun, for sure. But winning is a joy unto itself, arguably even more fun then "sexy winning"

Apr 02, 2014 06:54 AM
rating: 0
Andy Cochrane

I can feel for you. In my fantasy soccer league I have a "good" but dull team with probably just one top player in his position. Most if the players are ok and will get me decent amounts of points, but if don't have a Suarez or Rooney or many other megastars. Consequently my team is doing well but not going to win my league.
Part of this is due to the luck of the person leading my league and his raft of players having amazing seasons this term but part of it is due to my often timid approach at the auction, often dropping out when bidding for the top stars get too hot for me to handle.

Apr 02, 2014 08:08 AM
rating: -1

Hey, it get's worse -- you can also hate yourself for writing this and making it harder to trade the players because everyone now knows you hate your team. On the plus side it is a well written and humorous article

Apr 02, 2014 08:49 AM
rating: 2

Cheer up, man. I'll trade you Andrew McCutcheon and future considerations for Ben Revere, Andrew Cashner, and a beer.

Apr 02, 2014 09:58 AM
rating: 0

This is excellent. Not that much different than pro-caliber players for whom playing has become a job, watching amateurs drinking beers while manning first bar.

Apr 02, 2014 10:06 AM
rating: 0

So, the question is - will you follow the values again next year; win or lose this year?

Apr 02, 2014 16:40 PM
rating: 0
Archi Cianfrocco

Your story reminded me of my one-time appearance in the NL LABR as one of John Hunt's regular guys and my boring plan of buying nobody over $25. In the end, it was destroyed by injuries and the highlight of the season was Rod Beck saving 20 games for the Padres after being my last reserve pick.

As for you, things were different in 2003...


I have to admit I'm amazed this link is still alive, but I certainly enjoyed revisiting it just now.

The other neat takeaway is that Larry Schechter's team, complete with a $27 Robb Nen, clearly wasn't in value mode yet.

Apr 02, 2014 17:50 PM
rating: 0
BP staff member Mike Gianella
BP staff

Jay! Long time no talk.

That article cracked me up then, cracks me up now. I think Gagne and Helton earned a combined $90 that year. Good job, good effort, RotoHelp.

Re: Larry, keep in mind that LABR was 4x4 that year and closer values are way different in that format. Paying $27 for a closer was pretty ho hum stuff.

Apr 02, 2014 18:19 PM

Such an enjoyable read! I love reading introspective writing, especially when I can relate to it.

Apr 02, 2014 22:38 PM
rating: 0

My teams have players that I like (because I expect them to do well) ... and so I'm rarely interested to trade them away. So ... with your approach ... if you enjoy making trades, you've got that to look forward to. In fact, seems like you can turn it into win/win ... you can trade for players who are "fun"!

Apr 03, 2014 11:17 AM
rating: 0
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Premium Article Overthinking It: Takea... (04/01)
<< Previous Column
Fantasy Article Fantasy Freestyle: Thr... (03/27)
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Fantasy Article Fantasy Freestyle: Str... (04/02)
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Fantasy Article Fantasy Freestyle: Str... (04/02)

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