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March 5, 2013

Punk Hits

Why I'm Rooting for the Dutch in the WBC

by Ian Miller

The third World Baseball Classic kicked off pool play this week, with six games taking place in Taichung, Taiwan and Fukuoka, Japan. I watched most of the games this weekend (all games are being aired on the MLB Network), and seeing the Netherlands blank Korea, then lose a tough one to Taiwan cemented the Dutch as my team in the WBC. Here are just a few reasons why.

1. They call it “honkbal.” That should be enough right there, frankly, but I doubt my editors would be happy if I submitted a 75-word article. They typically like to have some content after the green “paywall” box.

Near as I can figure, “honkbal” is a literal Dutch translation of “baseball.” “Honk” is variously translated as purpose, goal, or base, and “bal” should be obvious. (“Bal” can also mean lump, globe, clod, or testicle, FYI.)

This literal translation seems to be a fixture of Netherlandian baseball, as the practice continues onto the bases and the players manning them: instead of going first to third, honkballers go from eerste honk to derde honk, touching tweede honk in the process. That makes the second baseman the tweede honkman, and his double-play partner is the korte stop.

The pitcher is the werper, “werpen” being “to sling, throw, or pitch.” But for some reason unfathomable to me, the catcher is just “catcher.” According to this site, there are nearly 20 Dutch words for “catch,” so why isn’t a Dutch catcher called a vanger or a teisterer? It makes no sense.

2. They’re managed by Hensley Meulens. Bam-Bam is a totally fascinating dude. Among his many claims to fame are:

• He was the first player from Curacao to reach the major leagues.
• He speaks five languages: English, Spanish, Dutch, Papiamento (the main language on Curacao), and Japanese.
• In 2012 he was knighted by Queen Beatrix of the Netherlands, so you have to call him “Sir Hensley Bam Bam Meulens” or he can have you arrested. (This last part is probably not true.)
• He amassed 0.3