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November 2, 2012

Pebble Hunting

Why Darren Oliver Might Really Retire This Time

by Sam Miller

We love baseball, all of us, but it can be exhausting, too. There are so many games. The games only matter in that they lead to other, more exclusive games. Then, once those games are played, we wait a few months and we start over, with more games. For you, it’s a hobby and a diversion. But imagine it’s your job, and all these pointless games just pile up on each other, each one bringing a new chance for you to fail in front of everybody. How long until it stopped being fun? 

Darren Oliver is 42 years old. The Blue Jays just picked up his $3 million option for 2013, but he’s said to be leaning toward retirement. Many times in his career he has been leaning toward retirement, but this one is a bit different for two reasons: He’s really, really good; and it sounds like he might mean it.

He has friends back home who have “just a normal life.” A big part of him yearns for that. His kids are at “a crucial age,” he adds.

“My kids just want me home. They want their dad. If I was a kid, I’d be saying the same thing too.”

Darren Oliver has the job you wish your dad had had, but his kids just want him home. It almost makes you wonder how anybody makes it to 42 without retiring. 

The first time he nearly retired.
Eighteen times in his career, Oliver started a game and didn’t allow a run. Three of those 18, though, were interrupted before the second inning by injuries, and that was the case on Aug. 5, 2004. Oliver pitched a perfect first, then left with shoulder tightness. By the time he was healthy enough to return, the minor-league schedule was over, and Oliver couldn’t go on a rehab stint. He pitched in relief for the final two weeks of the season, allowing runs in all four outings. He ended that season with a 5.94 ERA; with a  5.07 career ERA; with 87 career wins and 1,407 career innings. “He's 34 now and isn't going to be Jamie Moyer, so it's just a matter of how many ERAs in the 5.00s it takes to push him out of the league,” we wrote in that year’s annual.*

The Rockies signed him before spring training, he got attacked by bees, and the Rockies released him. The Diamondbacks signed him in April, and released him. The Cubs signed him in May, and released him, and from May 20 on he was unemployed. He pitched 32 minor-league innings that year, all as a starter. He gave up 34 runs, including 20 in 13 innings for for Iowa; the Iowa Cubs’ web site ran a headline calling his first start “The Mother’s Day Massacre."