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February 19, 2013 Skewed LeftA Meeting of the Mariner DHs[February 16, 2013. Peoria Sports Complex. The Mariners have all reported for their first mandatory full-squad session, which has divided into position groups for pre-workout meetings. Outfielders are on Field 2 with first base coach MIKE BRUMLEY. Infielders are on Field 1 with bench coach ROBBY THOMPSON, pitchers and catchers are in the bullpen. Scene opens in the coaches’ conference room where the designated hitters are having their meeting. DAVE HANSEN is addressing KENDRYS MORALES, JESUS MONTERO, RAUL IBANEZ and JASON BAY, who are all seated around a table in full uniform.] Hansen: Now as you guys know, playing time at DH is going to be scarce this year. We can only have one of you guys doing it at a time, so I hope that doesn’t make enemies of anybody in this room. We’re all in this for the same goal. Montero: Can I leave yet? I have to catch Felix’s bullpen. Hansen: No. Skip told me to keep you in here for this meeting. This is important stuff. Montero: [Rolls eyes, sits back down]
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Oh my. Funny stuff!