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Good morning, and thank you all for being here. We are excited to introduce to you our newest player. He will be out momentarily, along with some of the key decision makers responsible for bringing him here, and they will answer your questions. The entire organization is very excited, and our city should be, too. We’ll begin with some opening remarks from our general manager.

“We've gotten a tremendous player (1). The gem of the lot (4). A top-of-the-rotation starter who can dominate a game as well as any pitcher in the major leagues (7). A big-game pitcher, and a really tough competitor (12). He’s going to be a difference-maker (6). This guy is a tremendous all-around player (9). This man gets on base an awful lot (3). He makes the lineup deeper and more dynamic (11). It gives you a bona fide run producer (15). He can change the game all the time on defense, on the bases, at the plate, and not a lot of players can do that(11). We had the chance to get one of the best center fielders in the game, maybe the best defensive one in the National League, and we did it. We did it (2). Being a premium defender is something that is a priority for us (6). He is a great fit in our lineup and in our ballpark (10). He'll be a centerpiece of our ballclub on the field and in the clubhouse (5). He is a guy that is very versatile offensively and I think he's going to be able to hit in a lot of different spots (6). He’s been extraordinarily durable throughout his entire career (12). He’s definitely a great player (1). He’s going to be out there for a long time (7). Do we expect seven all-star seasons? No. If he has five seasons like the last few years, we'll be fine with it (5). He's a really special player(11). We landed an elite player and laid the groundwork on many other fronts. So, yeah, we feel good about ourselves right now (5).

“The bottom line is, we like him (13). He's a proven winner, and that's something that's very hard to find (7). A player of his talent, charisma, leadership and durability comes along maybe once every 10 years (4). I've long admired how he plays the game (3). He takes such good care of his body (5). His no-nonsense approach is known throughout the game (9). He comes highly recommended from people who know him (3). He's the type of guy who's going to hold everyone accountable to do the same thing he's doing, which is playing the game right and playing to win (9). He’s a fun person to be around (10). He has a chance to win here. When you have a chance to win, you play hard (1).This is the type of guy to give a long-term deal with. We still think his best days are still ahead of him (5). Every year he just seems to get better (11).Guys learn at different paces in their careers, and he is coming into his own (6). What people lose sight of is the ripple effect he has on the rest of the team. Greatplayers and pitchers make good players and good pitchers better (4). He has a history of being a good player. We really like this player, and he fits. He fits with what we're doing (1). I think this says that this organization is here to win (15).

“It's no secret that we have coveted his services for quite some time (10).If the alternative is not getting him, we'd rather be accused of overspending (4). The money doesn’t play. You put a ballplayer out there. You don’t put money out there (5). You have to keep swinging for the fences (8). When our revenues increase, our fans should know that we look to put that money back into the team. That's how you build franchise value (4). When two rival GMs in your own division are saying that you overspent, you must be doing something right (5). This is clearly the best way for us to go (12). Adding him was a priority and we were able to fulfill this today (14). I couldn't see us filling the needs that we laid out at the end of the season any better (1). We're going to follow the plan. We're a ball club that's on the rise. We’re going in the right direction (5). We are set. Not only for the year but beyond (14). If we win—if we get to the playoffs and get a shot at it—then we managed it right (1). We were a contending team before this deal. We’re stronger now (1). This is the start of something (5). It’s very exciting (12). This signing gives us hope (4). I’m not ashamed (5).”

(All of the above are real quotes from club officials)

Key:

1. Angels trade for Vernon Wells
2. Dodgers sign Andruw Jones
3. Dodgers sign Juan Pierre
4. Giants sign Barry Zito
5. Nationals sign Jayson Werth
6. Angels sign Gary Matthews, Jr.
7. Dodgers sign Jason Schmidt
8. Yankees sign A.J. Burnett
9. Giants sign Aaron Rowand
10. White Sox sign Adam Dunn
11. Red Sox sign Carl Crawford
12. Red Sox sign John Lackey
13. Mets sign Jason Bay
14. Mets re-sign Oliver Perez
15. Astros sign Carlos Lee

Sam Miller also writes for the Orange County Register.

Thank you for reading

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sam19041
12/19
Awesome. Unexpected twist (and list) was great!
APer930
12/19
I haven't enjoyed a BP article like this in a long time. Great work Sam