The Week in Quotes: The Week of May 24-30

A WHIPPED CREAM PIE IN THE FACE SOUNDS LIKE A NICE IDEA RIGHT NOW

"It'll change the way we celebrate. It sure was exciting, but you always wonder if it's an accident waiting to happen. This is definitely unfortunate."
—Angels manager Mike Scioscia on Kendry Morales breaking his leg after a walk-off home-run on Saturday.

"I'm just worried about Kendry. He's one of our best hitters. To see a great moment go sour like that, it's pretty bad."
—Angels center fielder Torii Hunter after the game.

"I'm not against people celebrating. Just be careful how you celebrate. Hopefully, players will learn from this example about how you are going to celebrate. I see guys jumping in the air, throwing helmets, taking his uniform off. It's fun. It's colorful. It's awesome. In the meanwhile, I hope they learn from that, and be careful what [they] are doing. There are a lot of ways to celebrate, but in the meanwhile, we always have to wait for something to happen to start believing how we are not invincible."
—White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen.

"It's definitely not the mood we would expect in the clubhouse after a win, but when something like that happens, it's definitely disturbing. These guys all feel bad about what happened, but you've got to pick up the pieces and get ready to play tomorrow. It's a lesson for all of us."
—Scoscia.

"It's tough. You don't want to see him hurt like that. I was in here, checking out my X-rays and icing my wrist, but I was watching the game and screaming after the home run. But the screams just went to silence. I've never seen that in baseball, and that might be cut out in this organization."
—Hunter (SI.com).

A HAND WAVE THAT WAS BOTH EXPENSIVE AND HURTFUL

"I went out to ask him why he's embarrassing Buehrle and he give me one of this. When you're a professional and you have to respect the managers, the way we're supposed to respect the umpires, they are supposed to respect back."
—Guillen, on umpire Joe West dismissing his protest of two balks called on White Sox left-hander Mark Buehrle with a wave of his hand.

"Obviously they have more power than we have and we have to wear it every time that happens. I don't think he has the right and the power to let people know who is the chief on the field."
—Guillen, on West.

"Once I got tossed I wanted to go say a few words and try to get my money's worth and just kind of find out what did I do wrong to balk? I think he's too worried about promoting his CD and I think he likes seeing his name in the papers a little bit too much instead of worrying about the rules. I'd like to find out what he called a balk on me. Your knee can cross over the rubber. I know your foot can't and I didn't do that. I watched the replays trying to see what it was called a balk and I have still have yet to see what I did."
—Buehrle, on West, who is an aspiring singer/songwriter.

"I've already told Major League Baseball I'm going to pay in months. I'm not going to pay with one check. I got a family to take care of. And they're going to get $1,000 every month. Maybe I finish up and pay the fine around May [2011]. I guess you can't call people names with the media, but I don't regret it. I'll pay my fine and move on."
—Guillen, on getting fined for his behavior in the incident. (Scott Merkin, MLB.com)

SOMEONE NEEDS TO GIVE THIS YOUNG GUY A SEDATIVE

"If there is a protocol that says I should call him, I'd love to, just to have a chance to talk to the man. But I don't think there's anything a guy like me can say to congratulate a star of his level."
—Athletics starter Dallas Braden, on Roy Halladay's perfect game Saturday in Miami.

"I thought it was great to see him smile like that. Obviously, he's a very serious guy when he's pitching. He definitely smiles; it's not like the first time he ever smiles. But that being said, that kind of joy is fun to see on someone's face. I think we all thought at some point this year it's going to happen – it might happen again – because every time he goes out there, his stuff is good. It seems like he would do that."
—Phillies reliever Brad Lidge, on Halladay's reaction to the achievement.

"I'm not huge on a lot of the memorabilia. I think the memories sometimes last longer than the collection of stuff."
—Halladay, on giving up his uniform to the Hall of Fame from the perfect game. (Alden Gonzalez, MLB.com)

JONATHAN PAPELBON JUST GOT THE MOTHER OF ALL ICE-CREAM HEADACHES

"If you can't deliver a ball within 20 seconds, you are going to drive a lot of fans away from watching you to begin with. This is a slow game anyway, in a sense, so we want to try to quicken it up so we can keep some people happy and into it, most notably the umpire and the defense. When you play slow baseball, it doesn't do anyone any good."
—Vanderbilt coach Tim Corbin, on the SEC's new 20-second pitch clock.

"I don't think the 20 seconds between pitches is anything out of the ordinary. I don't think that's going to impact things much. My only concern is when we have a catcher on base at the end of the inning and he's got to come in and put his gear on. He may not even have a chance to get a sip of water."
—LSU coach Paul Mainieri, on the new limits on time between innings (Jim Kleinpeter, The Times Picayune).

"If I feel like I'm going slow, I guess I will look up there and see. It's going to be like being a quarterback."
—Vanderbilt pitcher Chase Reid, on the new rule. (Jeff Lockridge, The Tennessean)

THE REST

"My whole family’s a huge Seinfeld fan. I asked him to sign a baseball for me. And his wife turned to him and said, 'Shouldn’t it be the other way around?', and I said, 'No chance.'"
—Mets first baseman Ike Davis, on meeting Jerry Seinfeld. (Steve Serby, New York Post)

"Anywhere they need me. If they need me for fielding, or hitting, or stolen bases — I think the game of baseball now is lacking the little things, the things that [can be done] to win games. I think I can help them with that, mainly their mind and how to help them win some games."
—Former Blue Jays second baseman Roberto Alomar, on his desire to rejoin the organization. (James Hall, MLB.com)

"Listen, he was a good college pitcher, he’s a good minor-league pitcher so far. But if I can get one of the top, what, top five starting pitchers in the game today for Strasburg? Because I really, truly, I hope that he could be that guy. I have to tell you, I don’t know that he could be that guy. And with his delivery, I could see the potential of a Mark Prior sort of breakdown."
—Former Mets general manager Steve Philips, on his idea to trade Stephen Strasburg for Roy Oswalt. (Mike'd Up, WFAN.com)

"There's going to be a draft here in a couple weeks and there's probably only a handful of 18-year-old high school kids who are going to get drafted who could come here and play. Men. Look at the rosters. You have Double-A, Triple-A, big-league guys. This isn't affiliated rookie ball; this isn't affiliated A-ball. This is way up there. These are 25- to 35-year-old men she's playing against."
—Yuma Scorpions manager Mike Marshall, on female Japanese knuckleballer Eri Yoshida's performance in independent baseball. Marshall managed Yoshida in the Arizona Winter League. (USA Today)

"This game is hard. This game is not easy. I think sometimes people take that for granted. This is just another day. Tomorrow I want to contribute for my ballclub. I'm still in the lineup and playing everyday. I told you guys in spring training and early in the year that you never play this game 100 percent. Every day something bothers you. I think sometimes people take that for granted. They think we're automatic, that we are supposed to hit a ball out every time. They think you can't struggle in this game."
—Cardinals first baseman Albert Pujols (FoxSports.com)

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Alex Carnevale is a contributor to Baseball Prospectus.